Motherhood...Emadus...

I haven't seen my grandmother - she died long before I was born. My mother has told a lot about her. My grandmother had many losses - her little brother and husband (my grandfather) were killed in the II World War. She lost two babies giving birth to them. My mother was her

only sunshine. When my grandmother was at the age I am now, she had to live only 5 years more. She was diagnosed of tuberculosis and at that time it was not curable. My mother was never allowed to sit at her mother's lap, she was never hugged by her mother - it was too big scare to give the disease to my mother. When I think about it - I feel my grandmother's pain - I feel like she could feel, the feeling is so strong that I really believe we live forever in our children and in our grandchildren and so on....It is life...And it is a motherhood - it is a special button which will be turned on from the moment of becoming a mother - suddenly you understand the power of life, power of being a mother, power of carrying all the memories and lives from the past...  

Ma ei ole kunagi näinud oma vanaema. Mu ema on mulle temast aga palju rääkinud. Mu vanaemal oli palju üleelamisi - Teise Maailmasõtta jäi ta noorem vend ja abikaasa (minu vanaisa). Ta kaotas sünnitades kaks last. Minu ema oli tema ainuke järelejäänud päikesekiir. Kui mu vanaema oli nii vana nagu mina praegu, oli tal elada jäänud veel vaid 5 aastat. Tal oli diagnoositud tuberkuloos ning sel ajal oli see haigus ravimatu. Minu ema ei tohtinud kunagi istuda oma ema süles ning ta ei saanud kunagi oma emalt kallistusi - kartus oma lapsele anda surmav haigus oli nii suur. Kui ma mõtlen oma vanaemale, tunnen tema valu - tunnen, mida tema võis tunda. Tunne on nii tugev, et ma tõesti usun, et elame igavesti oma lastes ja järeltulevates põlvedes. See on elu....Ja see on emadus - nagu keegi vajutaks emaks saamise hetkel erilisele nupule - mil ühtäkki saab selgeks elu võimsus, emaduse tähtsus, mineviku elude ja mälestuste edasi kandmise tähtsus...        

My blog post about motherhood is for the Sunday's Mother's day - I will go to travel and can not make the post later this week.

Olen neljapäevast nädala lõpuni internetilevist väljas, seetõttu on minu pühapäevaseks emadepäevaks mõeldud postitus nii varajane.

Happy Mother's day for Sunday!

Pühapäevaks soovin kõikidele ilusat emadepäeva!